Send offs and Safety
Even on the happiest day, you have to be cautious and safe!
Saying that “there is a lot going on” on your big day is an understatement. You have been building up to this event for months—sometimes years! You’ve thought of every little detail, but have you thought about safety?
I have so many stories about people being good and kind, but sadly there are also stories out there where people who are good and kind get taken advantage of.
This story was shared by the mother of one of my past brides, (who also is an AMAZING CATERER, Momma Burton’s Cupcakes and Catering , @momma_burtons on insta) :
“I just wanted to share an unfortunate experience we had at a recent wedding…. As the wedding party was getting ready to send the bride and groom off with sparklers and excitement, a homeless couple asked if they could come in and use the bathroom. Being the kind and loving families that were there, they let them come in to use the facilities. In that 3-5 mins they were there, the couple managed to pick up a backpack which just happened to have a wallet, phone, and two sets of car keys! Within 10 minutes of the couple leaving, they set off the alarm of one of the cars, which just happened to be parked in a courtyard just outside of the kitchen. The wedding party searched for the keys to turn it off and that is when they realized the backpack was gone....and so was the other car!! Police were called right away, but they did not track down the cars or couple until the following Monday (wedding on Saturday). In that time, the couple managed to spend $8000 on a corporate credit card and took everything that was in the trunk! They were tracked down in Price, Ut.
My warning to EVERYONE...no matter where your wedding is held...when the families go to send off the happy new couple, assign a few big boys to watch over the venue, gifts, brides room, grooms room, kitchen etc!! I see this becoming a trend with desperate people preying on the kindness of others! .
I was there in the kitchen right next to the bathrooms, but since I was busy cleaning up, I was not able to watch every movement of the couple. I wish I would have paid better attention.
Don’t stress about the little things
But do pay attention to unwelcome guests”.
Some ways to keep you and your guests safe on your wedding day:
1) Assign security detail
Don’t rely on the large group of people to be on the lookout for mischief, everyone there will be there enjoying the event and not surveying. As the Bride the last thing you want to think about on your wedding day is the guests wallets being safe. DELEGATE GIRL! If your venue does not have staff assigned to keep your event secure, give someone the “job” of watching purses, wallets, etc. throughout the day and ESPECIALLY during exits or group photos when the majority of the group will be outside, or leaving their belongings unwatched. **Make sure whoever you ask to do this is not a super close or involved member of the bridal party, and be sure to have thank you gifts, food, treats, or payment for whoever you ask to do this job.
PRO TIP: Don’t assume the venue will take care of this, ASK. Ask before your event date, and maybe even before you book the venue, if someone will be stationed near the gift and card table, ask if someone is watching the bride’s room, ask if they’ve had trouble with unwanted visitors or theft at previous events.
2) Put the sign-in table in a visible place
The sign in/gift table are often at the door or outside the door, or near an entrance that is far from the rest of the events. Most people will sign their name and leave a gift, but it may be a temptation or an easy target for someone who wants to discretely cary away some cards/cash or gifts. Consider positioning the gift table in an area that can be easily seen by the people in the receiving line, or if you won’t be having a receiving line, put the table somewhere within the main space.
If you want your book somewhere near the entrance and that isn’t near the main group, have the book and the gift table separate.
PRO TIP: Make a plan with your parents, and/or bridal party to pack up the cards (and if possible the gifts) at the end of the night PRIOR to the exit—i.e. When the couple goes to change, or grab a few things, or at any time when there is a short pause in the events, carry the cards (and gifts if possible) out to whatever car they are supposed to end up in. Be sure the plan is clear so things don’t get lost.
3) Ask the venue about secure areas
Most venues will have a brides room, staff room, or other type of non-event space that the bridal party (and vendors with gear) can stow away their things. Ask your venue coordinator if someone will be watching the space throughout the night, or if it can be locked during the event hours.
PRO TIP: If you have a locked room where people are storing their personal items and vendors are keeping their gear, make sure that the people keeping things in the room know where to find the person with the key.
4) Open house style leaves you more susceptible
Keep in mind that an open-house style reception leaves you and your guests more at risk.
PRO TIP: DO NOT post pictures of your wedding invite with the address of the event on your social media. I have seen so many posts on instagram and Facebook sharing the details of the wedding event for people who’s invites got lost in the mail. THIS IS SO UNSAFE. Especially if your account is public (and even if it’s private). You are posting the address and time of an event where you could easily be infiltrated by guests who are not there to wish you well on your special day.
Invites that don’t get delivered almost always make it back to the return address. Send your invites out early enough to collect the returned ones and send text messages directly to those you invited who did not receive their invitation.
If you are posting on social media because you want everyone to feel included and you don’t want them to think they weren’t invited (so you want them to assume they were invited but their invite got lost), consider posting something more along the lines of “We would love to have anyone who wants to celebrate with us here tonight we have had some invites come back in the mail and were unable to get them back out in time, please know you are welcome! Send a DM to ……. for the time and location of our reception”.
5) If you see something say something
If you are having your event in a location that may be less than private (or even if you’re not) consider mentioning to your guests to be aware of their surroundings and notify event staff if they see anything that seems out of place.
GUEST TIP: If you are a guest at a wedding, or a host of a wedding, and someone asks to come in for whatever reason and you let them, you need to be responsible and walk with them to the restroom (or wherever), wait for them to finish and then walk back out with them. If a stranger asks to come in as you are walking out with the rest of the group, as hard as it may be consider saying “I’m so sorry we are heading out right now, but I can take you to the restroom after the sendoff” or just say “no”, or ask an event staff member if they are able to walk the stranger to the restroom and then see them out.
The bottom line is, you want to assume the best in people, and sometimes you just can’t. Plan ahead for safety so your event is crime-free!
