Ok here’s the secret:
Somewhere a long the line of 90s chick flix and bride-zilla stereotypes we got this idea that it’s regular—even expected—for brides to be a stress case on their wedding day. THIS IS NOT THE REALITY.
LOOKING FOR A WEDDING PHOTOGRAPHER WHO WILL HELP REDUCE WEDDING DAY STRESS? LET’S GET IN TOUCH!
I’ve shot a few weddings where the bride (or the bride’s mom…;)) are genuinely being stressed for the sake of being stressed! It’s as though they are trying to find things to worry/complain/stress about! It makes me laugh a little, but it also makes me sad because your wedding day should be the best day ever! And I don’t know about you, but days that I remember fondly are generally not days that I was stressed out of my mind...
So that’s basically it, that’s the secret: You don’t have to stress. your wedding should be fun.
this is not to say that having a wedding isn’t stressful.
But planning is where you want to spend your “stress allowance” because if you do your planning right, the actual wedding day should be smooth sailing.
Here are things to do in the planning stage to make sure the wedding day is a stress-free experience for you and your guests.
INVEST IN YOUR VENDORS Hire people who are responsible, experienced and able to be trusted with bringing your wedding dreams to life.That way you can enjoy your day and have peace of mind knowing they’re all doing their jobs.
GIVE YOURSELF EXTRA TIME FOR EVERYTHING, have vendors set up early so they have time to adjust with any unexpected wedding day hiccups. Be sure things are set up well before guests arrive so there is AT LEAST an hour of time for the photographer to get detail shots before people arrive.
HIRE A PLANNER ( I reallllllly would suggest hiring someone who knows their stuff and is with you from day one of the planning process, however, if that is truly not in the budget ask a close family friend, aunt, etc. to coordinate the day of. involve them in the planning stages, give them contact info and a schedule for all your vendors. Provide them with design layouts so they can supervise the setup of everything, and then be sure to give them a really nice thank you gift or small amount of money because it’s a big job! * Be sure to choose someone who is close enough to be trusted and be there for you but not someone who you need in lots of photos or to be immediately present with guests like your siblings or parents.
GUEST LIST LIMITS Don’t invite people who are stressful to you and your family, or people who are drama inducing in any way. Include people who will show up for you and support you and your family on your special day. (if there are people who are stressful that just can’t be taken off the guest list, consider having a heart to heart with them in advance about being mellow on your big day, or just put their seat as far away from yours as you can and decide to ignore any frustrating behavior and let them do their thing without letting it affect you or your day. Try to anticipate what could cause them to act out and do the best you can to plan a way that avoids the issues)
BE NICE as you’re planning, be kind and considerate of your hired vendors and your friends and family who are helping you put together your wedding vision. If they feel loved and appreciated by you, you can bet they will feel 100% more personally invested in making your day perfect for you
STICK TO YOUR GUNS as you’re planning don’t settle. if your dress doesn’t fit quite right, have the seamstress make adjustments, if the person doing your food sends you a menu with a mistake on it, or your invitation preview isn’t quite right don’t just say “it’s fine”. In the planning stages you can hold out for, and expect perfection. (Save the “it’s fine, no worries, it’s no big deal” for your wedding day;)
IN THE END
Even the best laid plans can go awry. But just remember: Come what may, enjoy your day. If something upsetting happens (cake is late, flowers are the wrong color, weather is bad, your groom forget’s his tie….or anything else trivial but out of your control) It’s your wedding day! It’s about you and your love having a beautiful day with the people who matter most to you, and small wedding mishaps will be things you roll your eyes at and laugh about later. Basically, it comes down to what you want your memories to be; If you want to remember how “stressful” your day was because it rained then go ahead and get stressed—but if you want to remember how you laughed and danced in the rain, you can do that too! Either way the day starts with love and ends with love and that’s all that really matters!